Episode 24: A Conversation About Coming Out Later in Life with Amanda Katherine Loy


Hey everyone! Welcome to today’s episode of the Wright Conversations Podcast! For today’s episode, I’m joined by Amanda Katherine Loy to talk about her later-in-life coming out story, the demisexual experience, and her first sexual encounter with a woman. Amanda also talks about her love-hate relationship with labels, existing as a bisexual person in the world, and she gives valuable advice to those who are exploring their identities.

Let’s delve in!


In this Episode You’ll Learn:

  • [04:18] A bit about Amanda.
  • [06:50] Coming out later in life.
  • [14:18] From Orange is the New Black, to 5 months into a relationship with a woman.
  • [15:40] Amanda’s experience of demisexuality.
  • [19:27] Getting into the relationship.
  • [21:18] Taking on the bisexual and polyamorous labels.
  • [22:59] What the labels did for Amanda.
  • [24:35] How people reacted.
  • [25:43] The struggle of being seen by the world as something other than what she is.
  • [29:44] One of the best (and challenging) things about coming out later in life.
  • [34:22] Amanda’s advice to her younger questioning self.
  • [35:55] Amanda’s advice to others wanting to explore their sexuality.



  • “Until and/or if that emotional connection is present, I don’t even feel the pull to have sex with somebody, which I thought was just normal.” [16:52]
  • “Your relationship to your identity is like a living document that you can constantly re-examine and adjust as you discover yourself.” [23:37]
  • “I feel like I have to fight every single day to not be erased in my own body.” [28:50]
  • “I knew that no matter how I was received, I was going to be okay, because I was okay within myself.” [30:26]
  • “Don’t be scared to keep digging.” [34:49]
  • “There’s only your right way.” [37:04]
  • “Explore in a way that makes sense to you.” [39:09]
  • “At the end of the day, if we can’t meet each other human-to-human, I don’t really see a point.” [40:24]


Amanda Katherine Loy’s Bio

Amanda is a queer, non-monogamous, neurodivergent artist, storyteller, actor, coach, writer, podcast host, and trauma survivor. At the age of 27, she had a preventative double mastectomy, which she documented in her book, I Chopped Off My Tits. Her podcast, Live Your F*ck Yes Life, was launched in 2018 as a space to have conversations about the things that no one talks about. She is a recovering people pleaser, and she works to support other recovering people pleasers through her program, The School of Fears, Feels, and Fucks.


Connect with Amanda Katherine Loy

Website:            www.amandakatherineloy.com.

Instagram:          @amandakatherineloy.

YouTube:           Amanda Katherine Loy.

TikTok:              @amandakatherineloy.

Patreon:            @liveyourfuckyeslife.

Facebook:          Amanda Katherine Loy.


Connect with Rachel Wright
Website: https://rachelwrightnyc.com
Instagram: @thewright_rachel
Twitter: @thewrightrachel



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